“Cognitive
dissonance is often considered a failure of the human psyche. In fact, it is a
vital asset. Had people been unable to hold contradictory beliefs and values,
it would probably have been impossible to establish and maintain any human
culture.” — Yuval Noah Harari, Sapiens
Cognitive dissonance is exemplified in how we invest a lot of psychic energy in the belief that we are rational beings
with free will. Yet, in reality, much of our thinking is irrational, and our
thoughts and actions are vulnerable to the equilibrium of our biochemistry.
In
1954, social psychologist Leon Festinger devised the theory of cognitive
dissonance (CD) to describe our human strive for harmony in our thoughts, words
and actions. Motivated to reach consonance or agreement, we invent ways to
reconcile a conflict. These modes of reconciliation may include changing or
justifying our behavior. We may also completely deny the conflict, or mentally
detach ourselves from it. Yet, despite these defense mechanisms that seem to
resolve the conflict, the discomfort may remain.
The discomfort created by CD can serve as
the grist to drive a creative mill. Canadian singer-song writer Leonard Cohen used his nearly constant state of dissonance to create. He composed poems and songs expressing this human dilemma that resonates with so
many of us. In her well-wrought memoir, Becoming,
Michelle Obama writes about a life in which she is bombarded, one after the
other, with CD’s. She is challenged by the conflicting lifestyles of her
and her husband. She also struggles with the enormous changes that come from transforming to a public figure from a private one. Yet, she faced her
discomfort and became a model and productive first lady in the White House.
Like
Cohen and Obama, we too can live a rewarding, evolving life by embracing our
complex human condition to become aware of our CD’s and to integrate the opposing
feelings, thoughts, values and beliefs into our lives.
Psychotherapy
can also empower an individual to resolve their inner discomfort and turmoil to
bring about positive change. Resolving this inner discomfort is key to avoiding
splitting, which happens when we fail to
integrate opposites. When our mind splits, we view matters in an extreme;
things or people become all good or all bad with no gray zone.
Prejudice can then dominate our thoughts, closing the
door to open dialogue and to integrating and compromising another point of view. Denying, rather
than facing, this discomfort leads us on a path of self-deception. Deceiving
ourselves can prevent us from progressing to self-actualization, and as Henry
David Thoreau says in his masterpiece Walden,
we may, as many do, lead lives of quiet desperation.
Dear Reader, I welcome your comments. jsimon145@gmail.com
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