When a bicyclist disobeys a red light and almost
strikes me, or a driver fails to yield the right of way to me, a pedestrian
crossing with a green light
and within the boundaries of the crosswalk, I call out, “Thank you.” For
some perverse reason, my sarcasm--the opposite of what I really feel or want to
say--offers relief. What I really want to say is “You’re a jerk for
nearly hitting me and adding to the chaos of our city.”
The sarcasm is a mechanism for covering up--hiding
my own aggressive feelings. If I react with anger, that meets the wrongdoer’s
expectations. He’d dismiss me, feel validated, and think,
“Look at all the power I have to frighten
her and make her angry.”
On the other hand, a sarcastically delivered
“thank you” may baffle and confuse him.
“What? She’s thanking me for disobeying the rules
and almost striking her? That is strange.”
This unexpected response could add chaos in his
mind and even cause him to examine his actions.
Wishful thinking on my part? No doubt.
Nevertheless, it helps me cope with the aggravations of urban life.
Dear Reader, I welcome your thoughts.
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