The Finite and the Infinite

We need the Ego the self-focused, self protective part of ourselves which helps us function in daily life and serves as the central reference point in relationships.  Without the Ego to help us mediate and act in the world, we’d crumble.  On the other hand, if we’re overinvested in our Ego (and experience the world as if we’re the Sun with everything and everyone revolving around us) we may miss a lot of the magnificence of existence.

(Some of us are satisfied to live within the confines of the Ego. My Dad was satisfied with what I regard as the meat and potatoes of life; he didn’t have a need for the ‘Spiritual’ realm.)

How do we  arrive at a point of view beyond the Ego to experience the sense of the Infinite?  Unlike many hats, one size doesn’t fit all. What has worked for me is to free associate as I write a daily journal, jotting thoughts about events, with an open mind to question and reframe. This writing serves as a kind of meditation.

I find myself asking: What is my part? What lies beyond me? I become aware of the fluidity of boundaries between myself and others.

Many years ago, before I developed an awareness, my (un-psychoanalyzed) brother Bob said to me. “Do you know your words strike (and wound) a person (in this case it was my sister in law) like an arrow  as if you know the precise location of  their Achilles heel?”

No, I wasn’t as aware of the impact of my words on other people as I needed to be; listening with the third ear, and scanning with the third eye were valuable techniques I needed to learn and use beyond the office walls.

Back in the ‘70’s, my  psychoanalyst,  Dr. P  asked me to push beyond, to question my actions and words. I sensed I wouldn’t be the same person if I continued on this path, to see beyond the manifest.  I resisted like a bucking bronco, harnessed and saddled for the first time.

I was frightened, sensing I was leaving the plain of the land and venturing into rough terrain, unmapped hills and valleys as I learned to listen with the third ear. The famous psychoanalyst Theodore Reik, Ph.D (1888-1969) discussed this process in his best known book Listening with the Third Ear (1948). My vision was being  irreversibly altered. I sensed this change was different from trying on a new pair of eye glasses which can be removed at will.

 “Do I always have to see things this way…. even after I leave the office?” I said.  Dr. P. seemed startled as if no one had asked him this question before. “Yes,” he replied.

CONCLUSION: In the early morning hours, I write anything which comes into my mind; some of my thoughts seem sacred, as if they emanate from a deeper self; I can hear God’s voice; and at times, the Devil’s too- the Creator and the Destroyer.  When this precious time has passed, nearly every word must be considered before I speak.

Dear Reader, As you step into the unmapped terrain of your unconscious, do not be afraid. Be assured you are like everyone else:  You will step on landmines and you will reap the gold of awareness of self and beyond.

As always, I invite your comments.

POEM: FINITE AND BEYOND

Sometimes my diary

 speaks only to me

and sometimes a message

 shocks like a rock,

breaches the surface

of an ephemeral pond,

stirs up ripples which

  radiate  beyond

yearn for a grand

audience of ears.

Dear Reader: I welcome your comments. (jsimon145@gmail.com)